So, one of the great things about Darien is that there is a truly excellent lot for tailgating. There's just a huge field where everyone sets up camp and you can spend the whole day cooking, Kan-Jamming, and mentally preparing yourself for a concert.
The downside of this, is, however that the lot is nearly impossible to get out of, especially if you get parked towards the back, particularly because there's really just one little dirt road you can use as an exit. At the 2012 DMB show, we got parked further back than I had ever been. I pretty much knew that we were never getting out when the show was over.
When we made our way to the car after the show, I decided that sitting in traffic trying to get out was not how I wanted to spend the next couple of hours. The "children" were still high off the concert experience, recounting best moments excitedly. I pulled out chairs and blankets. Everyone grabbed a snack. We sat for a while - and then decided to give leaving a go.
Since we were parked so far back, we were at the edge of the lot, where the "tree line" is, essentially. All day long, people peed at the tree line. Lots and lots of people peed at the tree line. I pulled the car around and we saw a girl sitting at the tree line. "Ew! Does she not realize she's sitting in a day's worth of pee?" We cracked up.
I pulled closer to the exit but traffic was still backed up and at an absolute standstill. We pulled into another parking space because I figured it was better to sit in a field than sit in the car getting angry. Blankets & chairs came back out. So did the snacks. This is when the story gets interesting. We hadn't been sitting for long when the door to the SUV on our right side opened. I didn't see it but James commented, "That woman was not wearing pants." After a few moments, the dome light in the car went off. And then...the car started to rock. Up and down. Back and forth. We all cracked up. The folks sitting behind the car to our right cracked up. Then the narration began, "Uhoh, looks like someone's getting tired," as the rocking slowed down. "ProTip: Use the Emergency Brake!" when things got particularly rowdy. At one point the car turned on, presumably for either music or AC.
Then, someone walked up to the car and knocked on the window. The window opened slightly and someone yelled out, "Give me five minutes." We laughed and laughed and laughed. The knocker came over to us and asked if she could wait with us. "Sure, would you like a snack?" She sat down on the grass. As the story goes, her friend had met this guy at the concert and sexiled her in the parking lot. I told her she needed to get better friends because, ew. She was...a bit strange. She kept telling us how nice we were and how much she loved us. Her phone rang, but she couldn't find it. She dumped her whole purse out looking for her phone. It was in her bra. She talked to her husband and made thinly veiled references about why she was still sitting in the parking lot.
Then, the door to the SUV opened and her friend got out. Her friend said, "Look at me; I'm such a mess. My boobs are all over the place and my pants are unbuttoned." Gentle readers? There are some things you cannot unsee. This is one of them. Blech. The friend was also really mean and yelled at the girl sitting with us to say, "Come on, we got to to go. Get in the car." I stand by my assertion that the girl needs new friends.
As the SUV pulled away (to go sit in traffic), Zach looked at James and said, "Did you tell them?" James shook his head and said, "The girl that sat down with us? She's the girl who was sitting in the pee!"
The downside of this, is, however that the lot is nearly impossible to get out of, especially if you get parked towards the back, particularly because there's really just one little dirt road you can use as an exit. At the 2012 DMB show, we got parked further back than I had ever been. I pretty much knew that we were never getting out when the show was over.
When we made our way to the car after the show, I decided that sitting in traffic trying to get out was not how I wanted to spend the next couple of hours. The "children" were still high off the concert experience, recounting best moments excitedly. I pulled out chairs and blankets. Everyone grabbed a snack. We sat for a while - and then decided to give leaving a go.
Since we were parked so far back, we were at the edge of the lot, where the "tree line" is, essentially. All day long, people peed at the tree line. Lots and lots of people peed at the tree line. I pulled the car around and we saw a girl sitting at the tree line. "Ew! Does she not realize she's sitting in a day's worth of pee?" We cracked up.
I pulled closer to the exit but traffic was still backed up and at an absolute standstill. We pulled into another parking space because I figured it was better to sit in a field than sit in the car getting angry. Blankets & chairs came back out. So did the snacks. This is when the story gets interesting. We hadn't been sitting for long when the door to the SUV on our right side opened. I didn't see it but James commented, "That woman was not wearing pants." After a few moments, the dome light in the car went off. And then...the car started to rock. Up and down. Back and forth. We all cracked up. The folks sitting behind the car to our right cracked up. Then the narration began, "Uhoh, looks like someone's getting tired," as the rocking slowed down. "ProTip: Use the Emergency Brake!" when things got particularly rowdy. At one point the car turned on, presumably for either music or AC.
Then, someone walked up to the car and knocked on the window. The window opened slightly and someone yelled out, "Give me five minutes." We laughed and laughed and laughed. The knocker came over to us and asked if she could wait with us. "Sure, would you like a snack?" She sat down on the grass. As the story goes, her friend had met this guy at the concert and sexiled her in the parking lot. I told her she needed to get better friends because, ew. She was...a bit strange. She kept telling us how nice we were and how much she loved us. Her phone rang, but she couldn't find it. She dumped her whole purse out looking for her phone. It was in her bra. She talked to her husband and made thinly veiled references about why she was still sitting in the parking lot.
Then, the door to the SUV opened and her friend got out. Her friend said, "Look at me; I'm such a mess. My boobs are all over the place and my pants are unbuttoned." Gentle readers? There are some things you cannot unsee. This is one of them. Blech. The friend was also really mean and yelled at the girl sitting with us to say, "Come on, we got to to go. Get in the car." I stand by my assertion that the girl needs new friends.
As the SUV pulled away (to go sit in traffic), Zach looked at James and said, "Did you tell them?" James shook his head and said, "The girl that sat down with us? She's the girl who was sitting in the pee!"
omg soo good!!!
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