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All The Girls At the Party

Who: Outsidelands
When: August 10-12, 2018
Where: Golden Gate Park/ San Francisco, CA
With: A large number of children who now love their drunk Auntie Jen
Of Note: Oh Outsidelands, I'm so glad I can't quit you.

Day 1: Lauv, Perfume Genius, Caleborate, Carly Rae Jepsen, Lucy Dacus, Chelsea Peretti, The Weeknd
Day 2: Jessie Reyez, Freya Ridings, Jonathan Van Ness, CHVRCHES, Tycho, Bon Iver, Florence + The Machine
Day 3: Janelle Monae, Portugal. The Man, Salt & Peppa, Janet Jackson

I could give you my usual, "Oh look, I'm probably too old to be doing this but am going to cling to my youth until I am so old and decrepit that the arthritis in my knuckles won't let me cling anymore," but I won't. Instead, I want to talk about how Outsidelands 2018 was all about the ladies.

I spent a weekend in the park and was completely uplifted by messages of love, compassion, inclusion, and change - (almost) all of which came from amazing female artists. I'd like to talk about them.

Please note - I don't want to take anything away from some of the great dudes I saw. Caleborate, in particular, is one of the best rap acts I've ever seen - covering everything from student loans to parties and dropping a Regina George reference. Energetic, thoughtful, and oozing presence - he seriously blew me away. Plus, Portugal. The Man was predictably groovy, and charmingly self-aware; the screen behind them flashing, "Don't worry, we'll play that one song next," towards the end of the set.

But enough about the dudes, let's talk about the ladies.

Carly Rae Jepsen was pop music perfection - covering everything from the anticipation of that first meeting to the importance of having friends to talk to, all while dancing around in some amazing white fringe pants with her girl posse back-up singers. She painted a picture of femininity that showed fun and frothy aren't mutually exclusive to strong.

Jessie Reyez was a powerhouse with an incredible voice. She's an accomplished songwriter (Dua Lipa's 'One Kiss') who now has the opportunity to perform her own music. In addition to some great bops, she had the crowd chanting "love who you love' and loudly declared that, "it's okay if you have depression or have had it in the past; put your hands up - your friends will love you and be there for you". And then she told the story of her first time trying to get a record deal where a producer told her, "You can sing but are you willing to suck dick?” before launching into the super powerful 'Gatekeeper'.

Queer Eye's Jonathan Van Ness interviewed Michelle Wolf and Florence Welch and pretty much lost his mind at both. He noted that he'd always been "Team Lady" because boys had always been so mean to him and that he had so many strong, amazing women in his life to look up to. Also, when asked about trends he was into right now, he advocated a shorter (chin to collarbone) hair cuts and engagement in upcoming November elections.

Florence + The Machine BROUGHT DOWN THE HOUSE in a set that was equal parts ethereal and barn-burning. Florence gave everything she had as a person to the crowd - running, jumping, spinning, climbing on the barrier, and letting fans get up close and personal. We learned that 'Patricia', my very favorite song from 'High As Hope' is about Patti Smith. 'Hunger' was delivered as an anthem, a rallying cry that everyone is looking for something just out of reach. 'South London Forever' held such sweet nostalgia for days gone by. But then, in the lead up to 'Dog Days Are Over' (which featured some of the most intense harp playing I have ever heard), she had everyone in the crowd hug a stranger, put away their phones, put their hands to the sky, jump as hard as possible, and "let go of some bad thing in your life; some weight that is holding you down." I cried actual tears - because it was transcendent.

Everything about Janelle Monae was a delight - from her incredible back-up dancers, to her multiple costume changes, to her jaunty hat. 'The Electric Lady' was especially strong - as was 'Pink', complete with pants that looked like lady-parts (and were controlled by marionette strings!). SHe encouraged everyone to celebrate Pride every month and brought it all home with the sufficiently rousing 'Tightrope'.

Salt 'n Peppa apologized for getting all the 80s babies in trouble by encouraging them to talk about sex and then tore through their greatest hits.

And then. Janet Fricking Jackson. Her set opened with a video overture of some of the horrors of the last several years' of news - everything from "After Sandy Hook, this should have never happened again. It's happened 200 times," to a list of unarmed black Americans shot by Police and all the awful things in between. The screen went dark and it said, "You all get the message, right? Now, let's dance." I love that she took a bold stance that the political landscape can't be ignored but also wanted to put on a fun show. And, holy crap did she deliver. I said a version of this on Instagram - I don't want to appropriate gay culture but if anything in this world ever deserved a "YYYYAAAAAASSSSS QUEEEEEENNNN!" it's Janet Jackson wearing 20 pounds of extensions, with her army of body-inclusive dancers looking directly into a camera and saying, "There are so many hits, huh? Don't worry, we'll get to all of them."

Sometimes it's easy to get mired in the doom and despair that pervades the very air that we breathe these days. These ladies breathed some very fresh air into the world.

And now, because I can't be completely sincere, here's a list of my favorite things I heard over the course of the three days:

"I have an addictive personality so I try not to do Coke more than once every three weeks." - a bro in salmon chinos and Sperrys

"None of you assholes told me my bralette was on inside out!" - a girl whose bralette was, in fact, inside out

"What's your shirt say? I HAD A POLISH BOYFRIEND IN COLLEGE! His mom made hella pierogis!" -girl in line at the bathroom

"My mom said this credit card was for emergencies only but I am freezing and we have like five more hours to go. I think buying this sweatshirt was totally an emergency buy." -a girl in cut off shorts and a crop top spending a 58 and foggy day outside

"Where my 90s babies at? You all come here with your mommies?" -Salt of Salt 'n Peppa

"This is my boss; she's an OG." -one of the guys who works for me who I ran into on my way out

Caleborate! 

Carly Rae!

Florence! 

Janelle! 

Janet! 

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